So I am seeing this wholesome woman (+30 F) with silk-smooth skin, blonde hair and no excess fat whatsoever. And she is smarter then I can comprehend.

She would turn my head around once aware I wrote this post. Anyhow, I want to help her gain more confidence.

So, her skin on the lower legs is thin such that you can see her veins. She is ashamed for her blue Ones.

She told me her struggle. She shows me her veins. I feel for her awareness.

She got great legs. But she wears these legging-thingys even it is uncomfortably warm. I want her to feel the cold wind on a hill when we get around some place.

I am assuring her that this ain’t an issue for anyone. Meanwhile drawing them with my finger, wrongly on purpose.

Anyhow; I am trying to make her feel confident enough so that she doesn’t give af and just wear clothes appropriate for the trip & the weather.

Anyone got any advice for me or tips for her?

  • MagicShel@lemmy.zipEnglish
    36·
    2 days ago

    I don’t think you can really control how someone else feels about something. You can complement her, you can ask her to set her feelings aside, you can control your input to her emotional system, but you can’t control that her mom or an ex or an ad or whoever said something negative about it.

    This might be something where you can negotiate. In certain places or whatever maybe she’ll agree to go with bare legs (maybe not!) and then in general she will cover them. But there isn’t really anything you can do to control her emotions—even in a positive way.

    • mryessir@gregtech.euOP
      5·
      2 days ago

      Thank you for your warm words and offering your perspective.

      I only asked her once why she would always strap those leggings on. So this is the reason I know she is aware.

      I won’t pressure her. I am assuring her that those legs are premium. And I will continue to give genuine compliments.

      Just thought; Maybe there is something I can do additionally. And this thread told me in a way: time and comfort appears to be all.

      • MagicShel@lemmy.zipEnglish
        6·
        2 days ago

        She might be okay with negotiating. Maybe she’ll be more comfortable in a place no one is around or if it’s dark. It’s a way to take baby steps and maybe make her more comfortable in the future.

        But also it could just be something she doesn’t want to get over, you know? You seem like your heart is in the right place, so I’m sure you’ll respect her and who knows what will happen?