I genuinely think that weed is one of the most insidious substances, because when you’re even a little bit drink, it’s obvious, and you can’t function

But you can be low-level stoned, and pass, but you’re not actually able to get shit done

You’re not sloppy like a drunk, but you’re dulled, kinda stupid and useless

And that’s you for the rest of your life, because your brain will be fundamentally altered. You can stop smoking, but the effect on your prefrontal cortex is permanent. You’ll forever be the age you started using heavily

When I was seventeen, that sounded great…

In my forties, I know better

There’s a fine line between use and abuse

I drink

A lot

It has caused problems in the past, right now it’s not affecting my work or anything else, so while I know it’s a snarling beast on the end of a tight chain, it’s still leashed

I’m very aware of how easy it is to let that leash loosen, because then shit runs away

I know why I’m doing what I do right now, and it’s not a situation that will last forever.

I also know that the first lie someone with a problem tells is to themself

I have lost people to substance abuse

It’s easy to pretend that weed isn’t like other substances because you’re not stumbling or throwing up, but it’s not different at all. It’s you using something because you want to feel something different

Don’t forget that there’s a reason why people make jokes about stoners, and it’s impossible to see that you’re one of them when you’re numbed by weed

If you aren’t happy without weed, you won’t be happy with it. It’s just dulling the corners of reality, and it’s temporary.

Substance abuse is wild, and seductive

It’ll never ask anything of you, and yet it will take and take until you have no more to give, and you won’t see it coming, because you will always find a justification while the substance is in control

“It’s just…”

“It’s only a little…”

“I deserve a reward…”

Good luck to you, deep down, we all know

We’re great at lying to ourselves. The fact that you’re asking the question is a great start

Kia kaha

I’ve got $10 says they’re trying to make porn

It’s interesting

I moved to another part of the country for a change of pace. I just managed to buy a house here, I’m a couple of months into an entirely new job, my fiancée and I are making a few plans for our wedding (which will still be a while away)

It hasn’t been easy, but it’s worth it

I’m in a beautiful place, I get to see amazing views every day that I work, I have a sound financial position, a woman I love deeply and things are pretty damned good

I hope all of you are as lucky

Some nazi shit

If you feel guilty about a hobby, it’s not a hobby

It has become a chore.