when I think of the word “fetish” I’m thinking about people who are into feet, bdsm, femdom, cuckolding or MDLB. Not someone who just finds X ethnicity more attractive on average than any other ethnicity. Nobody for example is going to say to a white man that he has a white girl fetish simply because he finds white women more attractive on average than any other ethnicity. Because it’s completely understandable that most people prefer to date with their own ethnicity. But the minute that white man finds a black women more attractive on average suddenly that’s fetishization. It’s completely ridiculous.
My understanding of fetishizing is that it has little to nothing to do with physical characteristics, but is instead determined by stereotyping.
Saying you have a preference, even a strong preference, for physical traits that are more often, or even exclusively, found in a certain group is simply what you’re attracted to. Saying you prefer partners from “X” group because (insert list of stereotypes) is fetishizing.
For one example, consider the language that incels and people looking for “trad” partners use. They talk about preferring certain ethnic groups because they think all women from those groups are submissive, more feminine, adhere to traditional gender roles, etc., that’s fetishizing.
Those kind of fuckers would get a mail order bride just to fit the niche too.